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Birfday was lovely.
Extended I guess you could call it.
Got taken to New York and had 4 days of fun fun fun.
Went to the Met, the MoMa, saw a movie, saw dear friends.
Got to sleep in, stay up and disconnect from work stuff.
Strange that I should say that considering I'm 'on a break' but work never really stops does it? Like the DVD's coming out – we literally only just put the 'approved' stamp on the Time Machine Tour (the deluxe one is near to being sold out!) one and we're knee deep in packaging ideas and concepts for the animation DVD coming later this year.

Just those two projects mean that leaving my lap top at home is risky!
I came home to a barrage of 'urgent' emails that needed answers – but gosh it was nice not to have the seductive beckoning of the internet to lure me away from, well, living.

It's funny how dependent I can feel on being available online, but it was also very freeing. You realize you are given time off from being marketed to.

On the way home from the airport – we were crawling in morning traffic and I couldn't help but notice the various billboards for albums. Both of the ones I saw were for male artists, who's albums were advertised as 'The Number One Album!'
And I couldn't help but feel cynical. There is always a new artist, who is fawned over when they first arrive – only to be discarded second time out of the gate.
There's a couple of UK artists I'm thinking of here in particular – who were the absolute darlings of the press and radio with their first albums. But the follow ups are sort of ignored.
My point is, I looked at these two artists and just thought 'You wait until next time'.
Is that sad or honest? I'm not sure. But it's a very fickle time we live in.

Now bear with me, but this started me off thinking about the cultural temperature
We live in.

In some ways, I think of our generation as one I'm not too proud of.
We are obsessed with celebrity and we have a memory of a goldfish.
We're determined to stand out but we all look the same.
It used to be that when a fashion craze swept the world – it expressed itself as everyone wearing the same jeans. Now everyone has the same boobs and hair extensions.
We're given these role models who are famous because they wanted to be famous.
They have little intelligence but massive exposure and so contribute to the dumbing down of society.

Wow I'm all grumpy aren't I? hehe.

And I continue! So these people, these 'celebrities' sell us things.
Straight up, before anyone accuses me of hypocrisy – I'm aware I'm selling you my music and concert tickets. I'm honest about that. In fact it's a hands on approach I decided to make when I went independent. If I don't sell records I literally can't afford to make records. Simple as that.

No the stuff I'm talking about is the selling of luxury.
One massively successful hip hop artist has one of the most beautifully presented blogs and websites on the planet – and uses it to tell his readers how much he loves and wants various designer objects.
The irony is, he can afford them.
And gets them.

But the people reading the blog obviously can't.

Don't get me started on red carpets.
And the question 'What are you wearing?'
The truth? 'I'm wearing an extraordinarily beautiful and hideously expensive designer outfit that I am wearing in exchange for publicity. I would never pay cash for this. But the designer is hoping you will'.

It's very weird for me to be in a business like this when I feel so out of place with the
Shallow nature of it all.

I guess this is what happens when I'm in between albums. ;)
I start to think a lot and question it all.
Which can only be a good thing, right?

To end on a happier note (please! hehe) I wanted to say thanks to all of those who sent birthday wishes - and how touched I was that some people made donations to the Trevor Project instead of spending money on me.
I've said it a gazillion times before, but I don't ever want presents nor do I expect anyone to donate - but for those who insist, it's a very kind thing to take your generosity and put it to a better use than my ego.

Much love to you..
xxD